Telephone Reenactment

Paraphrasement of various actual converstations

Dad: Hello.
Hapabukbuk: Hi dad!
Dad: What’s happening?
HB: Not much, just thought I’d call to tell you the good news.
Dad: News? Oh. How is work?
HB: I got a promotion!
Dad: Ah? Promotion? Dat’s bery good. You are happy now?
HB: Yes! I’m finally doing what I want to do-
Dad: Dat’s good. Here is your mom.
HB: No wait…Dad?
(phone shuffling)
HB: Oh, ok…bye dad.
Dad: (faintly) Peek up da phone.
Mom: (faintly) Wait one second! Who is it?
(phone shuffling)
Dad: (faintly) Just peek it up!
Mom: (faintly) One second!
(phone shuffling)
Mom: Hello?
HB: Hi mom.
Mom: Oh HB! Hi! I was just ebaying. I sold your last care bear. 30 bucks!
HB: My last care bear?
Mom: What, you wanted it?
HB: I didn’t even know I still had it!
Mom: Well anyway, it’s gone now. So what’s up?
HB: Was it cheer bear?
Mom: What?
HB: Anyway, good news! I got a promotion!
Mom: Ooooohhh! Finally! So what's your title? What'll you do now?
HB: Officially I’m a [W/P] and I get to [tell stories in 30 seconds] full time.
Mom:…that’s it?
HB: What do you mean is that it?! Way to take a gigantic poop on my ambition, ma.
Mom: No, I mean I just thought you wanted to be a writer!
HB: I did, but you know the demand for my fiction was just too much and I had to give it up.
Mom: I always wanted to you to be a teacher.
HB: Ok I’m going to go celebrate now.
Mom: Ok, have fun! I love you!
HB: Love you too.