Weekend Excuses

Broke 2 lamps. Why? The standing lamp turned 12 this year and was on its last legs anyway. The table lamp...I plead the fifth.

Heard my electric guitar slide off the bed and had to shed a tear for the newly created chip along its front edge. Why? I’m a careless jerk who didn’t look where she placed a guitar.

Discovered that the mysterious little silver button on the back of my phone does exactly nothing. Why? I broke it trying to figure it out.

Chipped and cracked a drinking glass by accidentally slamming another glass down on top of it. Why? One of the glasses had 1/8th of a margarita in it. Guess which one.

Conclusion: I'm an ass.