Grab Your Paint Brush

Here's the paint:

a child's portrait
- i won the gold in a skiing contest when i was 7.
- i got a 'thanks for participating' trophy both years my mother entered me in a jr. miss america pageant. (i cried alot on stage. who would have thought i didn't enjoy being judged by a room full of strangers?)
- my best friend told me about tampons when i was 6 and she was 7. i didn't believe her.
- she also told me about sex. i didn't believe that either.
- i've only ever hit one person out of anger. i slapped danny gonzales when i was 9. i can't remember why.
- i got my first grey hair at 16.
- i confessed that i made fun of a girl named karen in order to complete the requirements for first communion.
- when i was little i always agreed to play this incomprehensible medieval board game with my older brother just to spend time with him.
- i took baton twirling classes for 3 years.
- i used to hook my hands over the top of the back of my dad's pants and swing between his legs when i small. that is, until one day i hooked my hands over a cowboy's pants and that ended that.

a modern portrait
- i cry in my sleep.
- i also laugh in my sleep.
- i suffer from bruxism and i think i'm developing gerd. (could they make these things sound any worse?)
- i refuse to eat mushrooms, brussel sprouts or avocado.
- sometimes i still miss my cat. it's been 4 years.
- i will not run for the bus.
- i never hit the snooze button. years of having the alarm clock across the room never allowed that habit to form.
- one of my first thoughts upon waking up every morning is what day is it?
- i'll try anything physically life threatening once. if it's fun, twice.
- i believe that life and death are manifestations of energy.