WTHIWWY - City Life, Verse IX

A reading from the book of What The Hell Is Wrong With You?:


Dear Pig Pen's mother:

I'm not sure if you've heard, but there's something called the swine flu going around. Yes! It's true! Right here in NYC! So I really must mention to you that repeatedly digging food out of your teeth with your fingers and wiping your nose on the back of your hand are not the safest of practices. Especially for a middle aged woman whose immune system is not that of a healthy pre-teen. While they may be acceptable habits behind the closed doors of your horribly unhygienic house, they are absolutely unacceptable on public transportation. If your intention was actually just to make me sick enough to get off one stop early, congratulations. It worked. But you just as easily could have let one go. It would have been less work for you and slightly less nauseating for me.

Invest in some toothpicks and tissues.
HB